You're Too Nice

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She did everything she was supposed to, right down to the casual day heels, and was still finding herself second-dateless. I dont know what to do, I am still inlove with him, I dont know how to approach. They're the guys I always date.

I apologize for using this in the past, I will be honest if I feel this way in the future. I apologize for using this in the past, I will be honest if I feel this way in the future. Regardless of your status in the relationship, whether you are just talking or actually dating, you need to be critical of your actions.

What does it mean when a girl say you're too nice?

I am 21 years old and will be a college senior this coming year. I was hoping that college would be a time for me to be more social, find friends, maybe even have a boyfriend. However, my time is coming up as I have only one year left, and needless to say I have never had a boyfriend, or even a guy friend. Nothing has ever really worked out between me and a guy, not even close. But sometimes we did, and it would be for hours, and we had a lot of fun. However, I sorta got close with one of them, hooked up with him, and then never heard from him again. And that was not the first time that I have only been used for physical purposes with guys who I thought were friends, and then they never spoke to me again. There are two guys that I work with who are very friendly, and very good looking. We work at a restaurant, and I sometimes speak with them in passing while at work as I work in the front, and they in the backand I always smile and ask how they are doing, how their weekend was, etc. If anybody needs help, not just the two guys I also sometimes bake things to bring in. Over the summer, things quiet down, and there are not many college kids left in town, so people typically get together to hang out. Yet, I have never been invited to hang out with anyone. We had many things in common when I first met him. He had mentioned once a possible big group get together dinner, but it never happened. I ran into him at a bar a few months ago, and he bought me a drink for my birthday, and I told him I owed when a guy says youre too nice a drink, and he said no. They are both very friendly in conversation, and jokes with the other girls that work at the restaurant, perhaps more so than with me, and from what I understand they even hang out sometimes. Do I need to bake more things to bring in. I am not desperate, I have not been around the block, and I am just a genuine person who is shy sometimes. People have told me that I am too nice. Am I not even worth it to a guy. Meg Dear Meg, Thanks for your question, or should we say questions. Baking, helping them out, etc. Sometimes people can even be perceive this type of nice as being desperate. And yes, you are definitely girlfriend material. In fact, you might want to dial it back a little when it comes to being nice to guys. You see, guys like a bit of a challenge, a chase. If you come on strong and starting doing things for them, they see you as a pushover, and someone they can take advantage of, but not keep around for the long haul. Sounds like this is already happening a bit. Bottom line: You sound like a sweet person. Think about what you enjoy, and look to meet people doing those sorts of things, not guys who just happen to live close to you. Also, see if your friends know some nice guys, maybe even your family. We hope this helps clarify some things. Feel free to ask us a follow up question anytime. Leave in the comments section below. Please when a guy says youre too nice your friends know about us. Everything happened 7 months ago, we meet up in april 2011 and I knew how much I liked him from the begining. It is not easy for me to like a man straight away, I first have to get to know him and offcourse find him attractive. We went out a cuple of times that week, he slept at my place but nothing happened. He had his ex girlfriend visitng that weekend, and I step out and left it was college and summer was comming. He graduated, his ex and his whole family went there and I just found it like a spring fling that I wont see again I was still inlove with my ex too. I went home for 2 months, I admit I went out with my ex for a couple of times but I couldnt get this boy off my head. We chatted regularly, then calls, then skype dates. He had a trip for a week with his ex, which according to the pictures they seemed inloved we chatted when he was with her during that week, nothing serious, just casual talking. A week after that trip, we started talking more and I asked about his ex, he said there was nothing and that he wasnt talking to her any longer. So we got to knoe each other more, talking like 2 hours a day and more. When I arrived, he was the sweetest guy waiting for me at the airport, we had breakfast and made a 5 hour drive to the collegetown where I was spending summerclasses. It was one of the most incredible summers I;ve ever had. He took me by surprise to skydive, it was amazing. All those experiences, those unique moments where things I never dreamed of. During this time, my family was visiting so he had the oportunity to meet them all for about 3 days. Then he left for 2 weeks for vacations and we continued comunicating. He then arrived and I met his parents. About 2 weeks after that he was moving to the west coast for work, I went with him and helped him move in. We spent a great time for 10 days. After this, I went back to college and visit him 2wice, he visited once, then we traveled together. In my 3rd visit we did had a good time, but this time was different. I was going back to my country because I couldnt find a job and I was graduating. After 4 days I got back to my college town, we talked. I was the one who said We need to talk becaus emy future is uncertain, and he also told me he had to focus in his carrer. I acted desperately, called him, texting, wanted to talk to him. He just replied my texts, never my calls, saying it was over and he needed his space. I called him and said how could he. I saw him a week later, and just said hello a couple of times, until I saw him hocking up with a girl. It destroyed me, I grabbed him and told him whats the matter. I truly regret everything I did, it was just hard to put my heart back in pieces. After 2 months I saw him again in a club, we just said hello to each other and that was it. I called him 2 weeks after, he ddint answered but returned my call. He said I was the one acting ackward, but whatever I didnt want to go into details, we talked as friend and nothing else. I guess he was just being nice. I then replied the email and he never emailed back this was about a weeks and a when a guy says youre too nice ago. Sorry if I made it long, the thing is that 7 months have passed since we broke up. Im keep having these crazy ideas that he still thinks about me, He probably wants some time for himself. I dont know what to do, I am still inlove with him, I dont know how to approach. He likes adventures, I just want a closure I guess, to talk to him in person. We look forward to reading your comment. What kind of closure are you looking for. Just keep getting out there and meeting people. We seem like the average students that chat about academic-related stuff. I nag so much about tests and homework that he basically uses that as a way to contact to me and get my attention… so I thought things would work itself out. One guy I turned down by talking about my other crush, and this guy still chases me desperately. The posts may be old but people leave comments on all of them. Are there any other points we should know about. When I said not attractive, I really meant the physical aspect of it. As for specifics, I could perhaps go on and on about the signs I got from him, to the point where many of my supporting friends are convinced.

When in a relationship, a woman will test her boyfriend to see how much she can boss him around and control him. I was the typical nice guy and I thought that anything other than being really nice was being bad or rude. He says I love you to me a lot, and he almost makes a point of saying that everytime we see each other or talk to each other. They become far too available. One thing that I want to point out here is that there is nothing wrong with being nice to a woman. There are signs you're too nice, and we can help you recognize them. If the ratio is skewed wildly in the favor of other people, it may be a sign you're being too nice.